judge me. i dare you.
What if I told all of you that this entire page was just one big social experiment, and that you’re all somehow falling for it?
None of you know who I am. Or what I’m like in real life. I think you’d all be very surprised. But that’s not really the point, is it?
Regardless of how I’ve chosen to present myself, or the image that each of you have cultivated in your minds about what I look like, who I am, what my relationship with my friends, family, and ex-boyfriends is like, or what my current dating life is... that’s all so entirely irrelevant. Like I said, you’d probably all be very surprised with the answers.
But, the point is that those things shouldn’t change the way that any of you view me. It’s as if society has this underlying thirst to lump all women into two groups: whores or ladies. Good vs. evil. Marriage material vs. one night stand. And I’m sick of it.
If a woman has sex on a first date, then she’s a slut, and when a man does the same, then his friends high five him?
Think about that.
The same way that short skirts are not synonymous to asking for rape, writing about sex does not make me a whore. And I refuse to cave into a suburban nightmare of a narrative that women should live in fear of their sexuality. Men don’t. And nor should anyone.
And look, clearly I’m not scared about what society thinks about me. Because, often times, they are wrong. Women weren’t allowed to vote in this country until less than 100 years ago. Schools were legally segregated up until the 1950’s, and these institutionalized practices have still yet to be reversed. Look around.
If we are not actively examining what is morally egregious about the world that we live in, then these systems and attitudes will remain in place. And unless you’re a white man, then you’re a victim of them, whether you want to believe that, or not.
The female experience is too complex to effectively delve into in full in this short post. We’re essentially told that we’re benefitting from the same ideologies that are, in reality, actively bringing us down. We’re told that men are here to protect us, and therefore, naturally, we should submit ourselves to them.
Please think about that: women out there, all of you. It is SO easy to bring yourself up by putting another woman down. By calling someone a whore, by commenting on their outfit, and by acting as though someone is asking to be degraded for the simple action of self expression. By calling another woman “attention seeking,” or for shaming them for being comfortable with their sexuality. By sitting back when those around you describe other girls as sluts, but thinking it’s ok because they're not lumping you into this same category. It’s so easy to be complicit. But that’s the problem, isn’t it?
At the end of the day, judge me. Call me a slut. Say it again. I dare you to, actually.
Because I know that I can handle it. But no woman should have to.